nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Randomize
