I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
It's rum buckets o'clock
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
Randomize
