Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical�
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
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