Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
Randomize
