I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
