Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
Randomize
