What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
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