I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
Randomize
