at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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