I left my keys in the garlic bread freezer in Publix.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
We have started to decorate penises.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
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