How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
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