she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
