The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
Randomize
