I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Randomize
