Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
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