yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
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