Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
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