Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
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