No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
Randomize
