My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
I love you. Go after that dick
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
Randomize
