wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air.
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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