none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
I'm both gender and math confused
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
Randomize
