I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
You are a booty call, not a friend.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
Why are your pants in the freezer?
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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