Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
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