its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
