When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
Randomize
