thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
I forgot wine drunk hurts
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
