at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize