Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
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