you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
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