It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
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