I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
