i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Randomize
