just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
Randomize
